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“Anton, you’ve got to stop obsessing about your promotion.
You’re doing a good job, but there’s so much you can improve and learn in the role you have right now.”
That’s what my manager told me during a 1:1, after months of conversations that were almost entirely about what’s next - my promotion, my growth, my next step.
He was right. I’ve always been too focused on the future.
In 2021, I decided I wanted to do an MBA in Stockholm in two years.I prepared the documents, researched universities and neighborhoods, and imagined exactly what life there would look like.
Of course, that never happened. A few months later, I met my girlfriend. We moved in together, got married, had a child — all without an MBA in Stockholm :)
Today, as I take my first steps as a startup founder, I still love to dream:
What it’ll be like to manage hundreds of people?
What might life look like after an exit?
What will happen in 10 years?
That’s just how my brain works - I’m a “Dreamer.”
And over time, I realized that every manager (and person) has their own default:
These aren’t fixed “types”, they’re modes.
And most managers I know lean into one “time mode” - and it influences how they plan, how they communicate, and how they make decisions:
The NostalgicAlways comparing today to the past, good or bad. As EMs, they resist change and stick to old ways, even when they no longer work.
The ReplayerCan’t stop replaying yesterday’s meetings and conversations. As managers, they overanalyze 1:1s and delay decisions by second-guessing everything.
The MonkFully present, grounded, focused. As EMs, they execute well, but may struggle to plan ahead or influence beyond their team.
The PlannerThinks one or two days ahead, always prepared. Great at keeping the team on track - but struggles when the plan breaks or vision is needed.
The DreamerAlways imagining what could be. Inspiring as a leader, but easily disconnected from today’s reality.
In the full article, I go deeper into each mode, and my take on finding the switch spot:
If you identify with one of the types, I highly recommend watching this short (38 seconds) video by Jensen Huang, about why he doesn’t wear a watch:
Last week’s dilemma
You manage a team that heavily depends on the platform team in the same org. It’s a small startup, so until now, things ran informally. Your engineers would walk over, ask questions, solve problems together.
One day, the platform team’s EM decides to change the rules:
"From now on, all communication goes through formal support tickets. No more ad-hoc conversations."
Fair enough.
But then - you hit an urgent problem, and you need their help. One of your developers approaches a platform engineer directly, like before.
The engineer brushes him off, saying “we only handle support tickets now.”
The platform EM even tells his team not to help you outside the ticket queue.
Your developer comes back frustrated, asking what to do next.
What do you do?
This was one of my biggest screw ups in my career.
I went in ‘guns blazing’, to confront the platform EM. I did it in front of both of our teams (who heard the conversation). I started nicely, but it escalated quickly, and ended up in a shouting match.
Of course, it created a huge rift between both of our teams, which didn’t help anyone.
There were many interesting answers in the LinkedIn post, here’s my favorite one:
It’s of course easy to judge a ‘clean’ situation, without being in the emotional turmoil of the moment (and having all the history).
Still, lots of great tips there. In hindsight, I would have:
Discussed the issue 1:1 as soon as the new policy was raised, trying to come together with something that we’ll work for both of our teams.
Have much more empathy toward that EM, and even ‘championing’ for them in front of my own developers.
This week’s dilemma
As usual, would love to hear your answers in the replies, or your own dilemmas!
It’s your first performance review at the new job. You’ve been in the role for 8 months.
You joined to build a team from scratch, and you did. You shipped on crazy deadlines. You didn’t bother your manager and figured things out on your own. You’re proud of what you’ve accomplished.
You’re expecting a 5, or at least a 4.
Your manager doesn’t agree, you get 3/5. "Meets expectations."
Your manager says you cut too many technical corners.
Now what?
Weekly Comic
Discover Weekly
Setting startup policies by . As EMs, we rarely set the policies, but we can heavily influence them. Working policies, travelling policies, vacation policies. Having sensible ones is a key part of retaining your employees (and stupid/annoying ones are a great way to lose them).
How to Escape Poverty (without college) by . A great article about how you can grow from nothing on your own.
